Well, here I sit, toes in the sand being awe inspired by what God has created. 72 hours ago, I was folding laundry in house that may or may not be mine in a few weeks... recessions are so FUN. After 5 months of the most uncertain times in my life, I sit here crying to God. I cry because my life is so uncertain with each passing day, and, lately, I see no end in sight. I cry because I know He is with me every second of every day, but like a child needing the physical embrace of a parent when life gets hard, I still have times I feel alone and need Him right there. Now we all know that can not happen. Will not happen. That is not how God shows His presence to us anymore. He is with us in the valleys and on the tops of the highest mountains, but this 5 month valley has proven to be a true test of my faith.
Nothing in our lives, aside from God, is certain. Waking up each day is never a guarantee. Your next meal, paycheck, or embrace from a loved one... could all be gone in an instant. As I sit here with the sand slipping out from under my feet with each passing wave, I know God has a message just for me. Even though that wave crashes down all day every day and rips that patch of ground out from under me, the next second there is another behind it waiting to give me the stability I need to keep standing. When life comes in and washes the sand from beneath my feet, I have to know with all of my heart, that God WILL provide steady ground behind it. It is not always as quickly as I would have it... but it is always there.
The ocean is a great metaphor for life because it is never the same at any given moment. Things are always growing, moving, changing... but yet we always know when we touch our toes to that 1st grain of sand... there the ocean has been sitting, waiting, always a constant. During a storm the surface can be a raging beast ready to tear us down, but underneath it all there is a calm. This calm is always there. It never changes. You just have to dig deep enough to find it.
It is just like God's love for us. He may put a tsunami in front of us to see if we can swim, and if our faith holds strong and keeps us afloat... there is always a calm after the storm. Just as one wave knocks you down, there is another rolling right behind it to pick you back up.
I am looking at a sunset that only our God could have made. It is like He painted it just for me tonight. The moon hangs in a crystal clear blue sky over the ocean like heaven is just past what my eye can see. I turn and look behind me to see colors of coral, yellow, purple, blue and red, and I feel God giving me that embrace I have so desperately longed for. Life is more than a mortgage payment or past due bills. It is about right now. Look what wonder He has given me tonight... the sting on my cheeks from the warmth of His sun, and the cool sand between my toes show me just how blessed one can be without a thing. God is truly great!
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
It's never as bad as it seems!
Hello readers, and welcome to my corner of the world today. I must make a confession before we go any further. I have been struggling with giving it all to God! In the midst of a bad economy and lack of work for my husband and me, it is so easy to loose sight of the fact the WE ARE NOT IN CONTROL! I can not control our lack of work. I can not control the mortgage company wanting money we do not have. I can not even control whether the money will be here to keep us in our home. I can control how I react to these situations.
After I came out of my delusion that we were going to just bounce back and everything would be ok, I had to face the facts that God may be putting this in front of us to see how we react. My husband reminded me the other day through a quote from "The Man Who God Uses" that we should not look at this as a crisis but as a chance for God to show us what we have next! We may loose everything we have.... FOR NOW! What we may not see in the present throws of panic is that the blessings awaiting could be more than we ever imagined.
So after drying my tears and accepting where we are... I had to go to God again and ask for strength. God knew in my heart my stress came form the fact that I was trying to control it. So here we are again... who is in control? As soon as I truly accepted that it was not me, my heart was lighter! These walls that shelter us each day are not what makes us who we are. Those junk drawers full of stuff... well its just stuff. These walls do not make our home... we make our home. Its a hard pill to swallow because, for me, for years and years all i dreamed of was my 1st house. Pretty lawn, flowers, a dog... the whole nine yards. I finally got it 2 years ago. God allowed us to get here and now it may be time to move on. I just do not know.
I am blessed with a happy family that is healthy and TOGETHER!!!! The walls are where we ome to at the end of each day, but we can make a home anywhere. I say all of this to you today because I saw myself failing to trust in God. As my husband said, I was not walking the walk. I fell short as a Christian, as we all do at some point or another.
Today, just take your 5 minutes to e thankful for what you have right now. Tomorrow it could be gone. Even if it was all gone, you will still be the same person. You are a child of God in wait for what He has in store for you. In these times, we all must reevaluate where we place our value! Thanks for listening to my ramblings today. As always, have a blessed day and stay strong in your faith!
After I came out of my delusion that we were going to just bounce back and everything would be ok, I had to face the facts that God may be putting this in front of us to see how we react. My husband reminded me the other day through a quote from "The Man Who God Uses" that we should not look at this as a crisis but as a chance for God to show us what we have next! We may loose everything we have.... FOR NOW! What we may not see in the present throws of panic is that the blessings awaiting could be more than we ever imagined.
So after drying my tears and accepting where we are... I had to go to God again and ask for strength. God knew in my heart my stress came form the fact that I was trying to control it. So here we are again... who is in control? As soon as I truly accepted that it was not me, my heart was lighter! These walls that shelter us each day are not what makes us who we are. Those junk drawers full of stuff... well its just stuff. These walls do not make our home... we make our home. Its a hard pill to swallow because, for me, for years and years all i dreamed of was my 1st house. Pretty lawn, flowers, a dog... the whole nine yards. I finally got it 2 years ago. God allowed us to get here and now it may be time to move on. I just do not know.
I am blessed with a happy family that is healthy and TOGETHER!!!! The walls are where we ome to at the end of each day, but we can make a home anywhere. I say all of this to you today because I saw myself failing to trust in God. As my husband said, I was not walking the walk. I fell short as a Christian, as we all do at some point or another.
Today, just take your 5 minutes to e thankful for what you have right now. Tomorrow it could be gone. Even if it was all gone, you will still be the same person. You are a child of God in wait for what He has in store for you. In these times, we all must reevaluate where we place our value! Thanks for listening to my ramblings today. As always, have a blessed day and stay strong in your faith!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Duct tape for the soul
Yesterday, as I was frantically looking for the Benadryl that I knew I had misplaced, I realized that my "organized chaos" had lost all sense of order. Where was the Benadryl you ask? Well, right in my sock drawer where it should be! haha. I can picture in my head running around the house before company comes over, and making one big scoop of junk into my drawer. My system of cleaning in a pinch consists of throwing an array of unrelated things in the nearest drawer that is not already bulging from previous "cleanings". So everything looks great on the surface but when you open it up.... its a big mess!
Now, come on ladies, we all have junk drawers right? That drawer that has missing screws that were left when you assembled that toy, a toy put back together with duct tape(it fixes everything right), half a stick of gum... OK maybe that's just mine. I started looking at these thing in this drawer that were not needed anymore. They were taking up space that I could use for other things... that I actually NEED. I am trying hard here to build up my tie in... you ready??? lol
How does this junk drawer relate to me in my daily journey as a Christian? Well, does your life contain "junk" in your heart or head that is taking away from useful things? Have things been haphazardly placed in your heart and forgotten? We all have those things! So, lets clean house today. Take inventory of those things buried deep beneath the "clean exterior" and see whats really lurking in those forgotten "drawers" of our souls. Let go of that stuff that is unnecessary. Those things take away from our walk with God. He does not want all of the clutter in our hearts because it really does take away from our journey. My heart is much like the toy I found carefully taped together. I tried to make it better and put it back to its original glory... but the tape is only a temporary fix with no guarantees that it will ever work right again. The things in my life that may have temporarily broken me were merely "taped" but never made right. Just masking the problems will eventually lead to destruction... not a firm fix. So, as a Christian, we have to look to God to make us whole and not depend on all of those "duct tapes" in the world to fix it.
I have things in my heart that I have swept into that drawer just to make it look pretty on the outside... but I know in order to grow that I have to purge myself of all of that to see what God wants for me. He can not lead me if I am bogged down with junk! So pray with me today that God shows you what that "junk" is in your life. God can clear it out and make room in your soul for ALL of the blessings he has waiting for you. Stay strong out there and put your faith in Him. Through God, all things are possible! Have a blessed day readers!
Now, come on ladies, we all have junk drawers right? That drawer that has missing screws that were left when you assembled that toy, a toy put back together with duct tape(it fixes everything right), half a stick of gum... OK maybe that's just mine. I started looking at these thing in this drawer that were not needed anymore. They were taking up space that I could use for other things... that I actually NEED. I am trying hard here to build up my tie in... you ready??? lol
How does this junk drawer relate to me in my daily journey as a Christian? Well, does your life contain "junk" in your heart or head that is taking away from useful things? Have things been haphazardly placed in your heart and forgotten? We all have those things! So, lets clean house today. Take inventory of those things buried deep beneath the "clean exterior" and see whats really lurking in those forgotten "drawers" of our souls. Let go of that stuff that is unnecessary. Those things take away from our walk with God. He does not want all of the clutter in our hearts because it really does take away from our journey. My heart is much like the toy I found carefully taped together. I tried to make it better and put it back to its original glory... but the tape is only a temporary fix with no guarantees that it will ever work right again. The things in my life that may have temporarily broken me were merely "taped" but never made right. Just masking the problems will eventually lead to destruction... not a firm fix. So, as a Christian, we have to look to God to make us whole and not depend on all of those "duct tapes" in the world to fix it.
I have things in my heart that I have swept into that drawer just to make it look pretty on the outside... but I know in order to grow that I have to purge myself of all of that to see what God wants for me. He can not lead me if I am bogged down with junk! So pray with me today that God shows you what that "junk" is in your life. God can clear it out and make room in your soul for ALL of the blessings he has waiting for you. Stay strong out there and put your faith in Him. Through God, all things are possible! Have a blessed day readers!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
The dying cockroach stance and being a Christian
Well, now that I have your attention, let me set the stage. Remember earlier we talked about setting the stage for your husband when he gets home? Well, picture my serene environment last night that Nate got to walk in on. 2 kids lying on their backs, feet in the air, and tears coming down both faces. WELCOME HOME DAD!!!! haha He actually did giggle when he saw this form of punishment actually being carried out by yours truly. I was no where near the happy homemaker when he walked in last night. I was trying to find my "happy place" in some Calgon-esk fantasy that was praying for, and I hear Nate laughing about it all. He actually found it funny... who knew.
Something that had me all bent out of shape made him smile. So, I stepped back and looked at it again. I saw my 2 kids... actually doing what I said... in the "dying cockroach" position. Mommy had taken a firm stand... WOW! After months of battles over not following directions, my kids finally surrendered to my demands. They realized that they were not in control of the situation. I was doing this to teach them a lesson. If you do not follow the rules, there are consequences.
This is so true in our role in this world as Christians! Everyday we battle in our lives for some sense of control over finances, our household, our jobs, ect... the list goes on and on. The one thing we can not do is CONTROL all of it. Sometimes, you must give in to God's demands of us. He demands that we put our faith in Him becuase He ALWAYS has our best interests at heart. We MUST surrender to HIS will, not our own. Life can quickly become overwhelming if we let it.
When God throws something in our path that knocks us down(dying cockroach here people), He has put us there for a moment to think about where we are and what we are doing! Are we fighting His authority in our lives and disobeying the rules we know are there for us?
Today, take your 5 minutes to examine the areas of our lives that are knocking us down on our backs. Why has God chosen to put this bump in the road here for us? It is your job as a Christian to give it to God. Let Him carry the burden so you can focus on what He may have in store for you. Just take today. Look at today! What is your "daily bread" for this moment?
God is the ruler of our hearts and actions... He has His ways of putting us in time out to get it all together. I am still striving for this is my house... I think I need to be a mix of June Cleaver and a drill Sgt! June Cleaver in camo... I love it. If you have never surrendered your life to God, DO IT NOW.
Ask God to show you what he has for you today. Be still and listen with your heart. His answers are there but you can't hear them when you are fighting His will.
Something that had me all bent out of shape made him smile. So, I stepped back and looked at it again. I saw my 2 kids... actually doing what I said... in the "dying cockroach" position. Mommy had taken a firm stand... WOW! After months of battles over not following directions, my kids finally surrendered to my demands. They realized that they were not in control of the situation. I was doing this to teach them a lesson. If you do not follow the rules, there are consequences.
This is so true in our role in this world as Christians! Everyday we battle in our lives for some sense of control over finances, our household, our jobs, ect... the list goes on and on. The one thing we can not do is CONTROL all of it. Sometimes, you must give in to God's demands of us. He demands that we put our faith in Him becuase He ALWAYS has our best interests at heart. We MUST surrender to HIS will, not our own. Life can quickly become overwhelming if we let it.
When God throws something in our path that knocks us down(dying cockroach here people), He has put us there for a moment to think about where we are and what we are doing! Are we fighting His authority in our lives and disobeying the rules we know are there for us?
Today, take your 5 minutes to examine the areas of our lives that are knocking us down on our backs. Why has God chosen to put this bump in the road here for us? It is your job as a Christian to give it to God. Let Him carry the burden so you can focus on what He may have in store for you. Just take today. Look at today! What is your "daily bread" for this moment?
God is the ruler of our hearts and actions... He has His ways of putting us in time out to get it all together. I am still striving for this is my house... I think I need to be a mix of June Cleaver and a drill Sgt! June Cleaver in camo... I love it. If you have never surrendered your life to God, DO IT NOW.
Ask God to show you what he has for you today. Be still and listen with your heart. His answers are there but you can't hear them when you are fighting His will.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Where oh where does the time go?
Well, dear followers, I have not given you 5 minutes in many days. My June Cleaverness gets worse and worse. Whats a girl to do? Grab your coffee and have a seat... we have much to discuss.
Life goes so fast and we rarely slow down anymore to enjoy it. Last week, the people of Nashville lost one of the best newsmen anywhere. Dan Miller passed away last week quickly and left everyone in shock. I have watched Mr. Miller on the news almost every night since I was little. He was always on air every night with my family telling us what was important that day. He was just ALWAYS there every day... without a doubt. Then one day he was gone. It just is not the same. It was like losing a member of the family in a way. Well, that got me thinking. How do a wife and a young daughter grasp the fact that he was taken with out notice? Do the people in our lives know how we feel about them? His death put my life into perspective in a flash. Our Father could call us home at any moment without notice.
We all know every second of every day that we are 100% loved by God. His love is not doubted. Can people in your life say the same? If someone you love was taken today, would you know that they knew what was in your heart? Time has a way of changing the dynamics of a relationship. The role of parent and child is constantly evolving. Its a growing and changing relationship that bends at time's will. Friends can come and go. Some you think will be in your life forever, and others actually are there for the long haul. Each year brings new blessings, challenges and tests of bonds. The things that seem so big today mean nothing in 5 years. Little things left unattended can fester and grow into a raging bull out of hand.
It all goes back to time. We have all the time in the world and yet none of it is guaranteed. This may be your last day on this Earth. Which has meandered us to our daily challenge my loyal readers... all 3 of you! (I am an acquired taste and you are all brilliant for getting my wit. It is my humility that draws people in! Ha. Big fan of the inner dialogue, yet?)
Take your 5 minutes today and think of things in your life that may be unfinished or out of balance. Is everything how you want it to be in your life? That "Going to get to it someday" list that have have lying around collecting dust(don't deny it because I have one too) will not wait for time. Make a call or let go of something that is weighing on your heart. Tomorrow is NOT a guarantee. It is a gift from God, and we owe it to HIM to make the most of every second we have the privileged of living on this Earth.
I watched my son take his first Lord's Supper on Easter, and it hit me how blessed I am. So, I am trying to find pleasure in those mundane tasks that I hate some days. I get to wash the dirty socks of the little boy who is healthy enough to run and play in to get them stinky. I have the money to buy milk for the little princess who spills it all over my clean carpet. I get to be wrapped in the arms of the sweaty man who sometimes comes home grumpy from working hard all day to provide for us. Those dirty dishes in the sink are there at the end of the day because we are lucky enough to all be back at the table for another night together. Life is truly grand! So to all of you in my life that love me for all of my flaws and have help me be who I am and who I am becoming... I sincerely thank you. Love is free but priceless!
Life goes so fast and we rarely slow down anymore to enjoy it. Last week, the people of Nashville lost one of the best newsmen anywhere. Dan Miller passed away last week quickly and left everyone in shock. I have watched Mr. Miller on the news almost every night since I was little. He was always on air every night with my family telling us what was important that day. He was just ALWAYS there every day... without a doubt. Then one day he was gone. It just is not the same. It was like losing a member of the family in a way. Well, that got me thinking. How do a wife and a young daughter grasp the fact that he was taken with out notice? Do the people in our lives know how we feel about them? His death put my life into perspective in a flash. Our Father could call us home at any moment without notice.
We all know every second of every day that we are 100% loved by God. His love is not doubted. Can people in your life say the same? If someone you love was taken today, would you know that they knew what was in your heart? Time has a way of changing the dynamics of a relationship. The role of parent and child is constantly evolving. Its a growing and changing relationship that bends at time's will. Friends can come and go. Some you think will be in your life forever, and others actually are there for the long haul. Each year brings new blessings, challenges and tests of bonds. The things that seem so big today mean nothing in 5 years. Little things left unattended can fester and grow into a raging bull out of hand.
It all goes back to time. We have all the time in the world and yet none of it is guaranteed. This may be your last day on this Earth. Which has meandered us to our daily challenge my loyal readers... all 3 of you! (I am an acquired taste and you are all brilliant for getting my wit. It is my humility that draws people in! Ha. Big fan of the inner dialogue, yet?)
Take your 5 minutes today and think of things in your life that may be unfinished or out of balance. Is everything how you want it to be in your life? That "Going to get to it someday" list that have have lying around collecting dust(don't deny it because I have one too) will not wait for time. Make a call or let go of something that is weighing on your heart. Tomorrow is NOT a guarantee. It is a gift from God, and we owe it to HIM to make the most of every second we have the privileged of living on this Earth.
I watched my son take his first Lord's Supper on Easter, and it hit me how blessed I am. So, I am trying to find pleasure in those mundane tasks that I hate some days. I get to wash the dirty socks of the little boy who is healthy enough to run and play in to get them stinky. I have the money to buy milk for the little princess who spills it all over my clean carpet. I get to be wrapped in the arms of the sweaty man who sometimes comes home grumpy from working hard all day to provide for us. Those dirty dishes in the sink are there at the end of the day because we are lucky enough to all be back at the table for another night together. Life is truly grand! So to all of you in my life that love me for all of my flaws and have help me be who I am and who I am becoming... I sincerely thank you. Love is free but priceless!
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